Too Much to Handle
by shingeki-no-Marukaite-Chikyuu
Summary: Allen picks up a girl at the bar and takes her home, not knowing that he can't handle her. (2p! FACE eventually)
1. Ch 1 Can I Buy you a Drink?

**Too Much to Handle**

**Author's Notes:**

**This fan-fiction was inspired by an dream I had one night enjoy. **

· Allen picks up a girl at the bar and takes her home, not knowing that he can't handle her. (2p! FACE eventually)

**Can I Buy You a Drink?**

_Ahh! I love the smell of happy hour._ Al thought as he walked through the doors of the bar. As he walks into the bar he scans the place for any fights to pick or girls to take home. Then he sees her. She had short wavy brown hair and dark tanned skin like his. She was in a dark chocolate brown jacket, had sunglasses on top of her head and short jeans shorts from what Al could tell from her back side. _And she seems to be all by herself too. Perfect!_ He then walks over and asks "Hey doll face! How about I buy you some drinks?"

The girl then turns her chair toward Al, in her short white shirt exposing her midriff and her deep magenta-pink eyes. "Only if you are not a jackass and run off leaving me to pay for the drinks" she responds.

"Why would I run off like an asshole and leave a pretty little doll face like you here to pay for the drinks? What would you like?" Al said slyly as he takes the empty stool next to the girl.

"And what the fuck do you want so badly that you are so fucking eager to buy me a drink?" the girl responds facing the counter trying not to look at Al.

"Oh, I can't buy a drink for a beautiful doll face." he response sweetly as he puts his hand on her face. "If I were as fucking hot as you are, I would let anyone buy me drinks and never pay for a one again. Al then turns the brunette's chair so she is facing him and smiles showing his missing molar and asks "What will it be?"

"I'll have a Long Island Iced Tea, then if that is not too much trouble." she finally states. _It has to be him. He looks and has the same missing tooth as him. I finally found Allen Jones._


	2. Ch 2 Cocktails and Big Hits

**Cocktails and Big Hits**

**Author's Note: **

**Might be awhile before the next chapter is uploaded. (It's almost done (It's a good one) but I like to have a good start on other chapter before I post it and my ideas for ch. 4 are sort of jumbled. Also I want to work on other fanfictions as well.) **

"Alright then, Bartender can you please get this lovely Miss a Long Island Iced Tea and for me, a Nixon?" Al yells over to the bartender with his New York accent. "By the way I am Allen Jones." he says as he introduces himself to the girl.

_Yes I was right! It is him! _She thought to herself and responds with "I'm Emily."

"So are you from here?" he asks hoping to find out more about this girl. Then the bartender comes over with their drinks.

"No, but it is not that different from home. I think I can manage." She responds playing with the straw in her drink still giving Al a cold shoulder.

"Do you have a place to stay? If you want to, you can stay at my house." Al request as he puts his arm around Emily's shoulders. Surprisingly she does not knock his arm off her shoulders.

"No I do not have a place to crash, but I guess that I can stay at whatever hellhole you live in." she accepts as she takes a sip of her Long Island Iced Tea.

"Really are you sure? Because there is no fucking going back now, doll face." Al replies spitting out majority of his Nixon due to Emily's response.

"Yeah sure why not. Why stay at an overpriced hotel when I can crash at a guy's house who will buy me drinks." she reasons. After a few more drinks Emily says "Say we should head home. It is starting to get late."

"Ok, I'll give you the money for the drinks and bring my car up front and pick you up out front." Al as he slides his credit card over towards Emily, however she stops Al's hand from leaving the money.

"I thought that you said were paying for the fucking drinks?" she response trying keep his hand on the table.

"Yes fucking I am." Al yells as he frees his hand from Emily's grip and then rubs the card in her face. "See the fucking card."

"Yes I see the fucking card, but how do I know that your card will not max out and you ditch me here alone?" Emily argued. "And besides I have all of my things in my car and you had more drinks than I had, I should drive to your house."

"Ugh fine. I'll give you 10 minutes if you don't show up by then; I'll leave and you can find another fucking place to stay." Al states frustrated. Emily leaves to get her car. Once Al is done paying he walks outside and smokes a cigarette.

His patiently waiting for Emily is broken by a shriek of his name, "AALLLLEENN, HELLPP MMMEEEE!"

_Emily. She's in trouble, but I have no fucking idea of where the hell she's fucking is! It sounded like she's in the alley behind the fucking bar _he thinks to himself as he runs down the dark garbage alley next to the bar. He turns around the corner to the back of the bar; no one seems to be there. _Oh fuck no one's here. Emily is probably being tortured by God what bastard, hoping that I will find her and kick their ass, _he thought as he kicks a dumpster. Then suddenly he feels a whack on his head and falls stomach down on the cold concrete. It felt like being hit with a piece of wood with nails though it, but he had his bat in his hand. This smack felt somewhat familiar to him. _Matt, _he thinks as he jumps to a conclusion on him being the mystery Emily-napper. "HEY MATT YOU SON OF A BITCH! WHAT THE FUCKING HELL DID YOU DO WITH MY DOLL FACE?" Al yells at the person while turning onto his back and swung the bat to hit the inscrutable individual. However the figure now above him, swung a bat, similar to Al's but darker, and knocked his bat five feet away from him and out of his reach. Now Al knew that this was not Matt.

The perpetrator puts the nail-studded bat next to Al's head and said in a feminine like tone, which startled Al, "Who the fuck is Matt?"

He then looks closer to the person but he can't tell who it really is due to the darkness and having a hard hit to the head. He then questions, "Emily?" Then the person takes another swing at Al and he is unconscious.


	3. Ch 3 Part B

**Part B**

***Hey school is finally out! Yes within a few hours at 7 on 5 June 2014 EST I will be a senior. What other way to celebrate than an update? **

**First off I would like to thank historyaddict for commenting and giving me the courage to continue working on my fanfic. **

**This chapter is mostly from Emily's view point and for a warning the next chapter there is some smut. More updates to come for new and old stories.**

"Yes! I finally I did it." Emily sequels as she drags Al's and her bats into her trunk of her black Audi R8. "After months of searching for the 2p! America, I knew pissing off Olivia so much that she would to send me away to a different world would make my task easier." Emily then slams the trunk closed and walks back to the alley to bring Al to the car. _Ugh he is heavier than he looks; _she thinks as she puts Al's left arm over her shoulder and lifts him to his feet. _It's a good thing that his hair is an auburn color because it hides the blood petty well._ As she appears from the alley and drags Al along the street, a young gentleman sees her struggling with the passed out Al.

"Hey do you need any help miss?" the stranger asks.

"Oh yes please and thank you. I did not think he would be this heavy." Emily approved as the man grabbed hold of Al's right arm.

"So you know this guy correct?" he asks the girl.

"Yeah he is my boyfriend. He had too many drinks at the bar and passed out." Emily lied.

"Does he do this often?"

"No… not really. He can be wild sometimes… like tonight, but he is normally with his friend when he does. Oh I should had parked closer to the bar… but I knew I could not…"

Emily brings up so fake tear to sell the deal when the fellow stops her and stated "It's ok I am happy to help you. Don't you worry." The trio finally gets to the car and the young adult helps her put Al in the passage seat and asks "Do you want me to come with you to help him into your home?"

"No I should be fine. I'll set him on the couch. I can handle it." She responds as she opens door of the car. "Thank you for all your help." she thanked as she gave the stranger a kiss in the cheek leaving a light pink kiss mark on his cheek. Emily then hops in to her vehicle and drives away leaving the man standing in the parking lot holding his hand over his marked cheek.

_Now all I have to do now is to find out where this bastard lives. _She thinks as she starts to drive out of the city. _It seems that this world is not too different from my world. I wonder if his house is in the same site as mine. There is one way to test this theory; I'll go to where Olivia, Francine, and Mel house would be. _She then gets on to the highway and heads towards the FACE household.

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She finally gets to the FACE house and parks out front to see if her theory is true. The house is a two-story light yellow suburb house with a small white picket fence blocking the backyard. The front lawn seemed well-kept with a freshly cut lawn and a garden surrounding the house. The only exception is of a few broken lawn gnomes._ Well who did that? _Emily thinks already having a feeling that is was the person unconscious in her passage seat._ Well I should get closer to the house to make should this is the 2P! FACE house. _She reasons as she goes out of her car and sneaks up towards the house. She steps into the garden trying to stop her urge to destroy the flower bed or the gnomes. She then peaks her head to the window. She sees the surprisingly tidy living room and the Canadian laying on the couch with his feet on the couch and his laptop and a drunken France in the arm-chair.

From the window she can hear a muffled cheery England saying, "I made cupcakes! Who wants any?"

Matt takes out his ear buds out of his ears replies with, "Fuck no."

"Now honey you know better than to swear in the house." Oliver warns as he walks towards the living room. "Now pay to the… GET YOUR FILTHY FEET OFF OF THE COUCH NOW!" He screeches he goes into the living room. The Canadian takes his feet off of the couch and tries to be a smart-ass by putting his feet with his dirty boots onto the table. "Oh no feet go on the floor NOT THE FURNITURE!" Oliver then looks for the intoxicated France for help, "Can you please talk some manners into Matthew?" However the drunken Frenchman does not help the British man's plea, instead he makes the situation worst.

"Hey you maple-sucking bum! Go to your own house and leave us to…"

_That is most definitely the 2P! FACE house. _Emily thinks as she leaves the window and makes a dash for her car. She left because of 1. She did not want to hear what Francois wanted to do with Oliver and 2. To leave before Matt decides leave the house to find her or her car with the passed out Al. Once she finally gets into the car she looks at Al and says "Let's go home."

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She pulls up to the house that is similar to the FACE house, however is in worst shape. The lawn is a crispy brown with bald spots and trash throughout. _Let's hope that this is the bastard's house. It seems like it. _ She gets out of the car taking her bat with her in case this is not Al's house. She then sees the mail box near the front door. _Hmm I wonder if the ass looks at his mail. _She walks up to the door and opens the mailbox and multiple letters addressed to Allen Jones flutter out of the box. So far her night seems to be full of luck with her finally finding Al and take him home with her. _Now there is only one more obstacle, how do I get inside? _She tries the door hoping to push her good luck, however the door is locked. Next she checks under the mat that says: Fuck You!, but there is not a key there. _This son of a bitch better have a damn key on him or an unlocked backdoor, or I'm throwing him through the fucking window to get in. _ She walks over to the passenger side of the car and opens to the door. She then checks the American's jean pockets to see it he has his keys. _Dear God please don't make Al come out of his comma and see me digging though his pockets._ However like the rest of her day as gone by she finally finds a pair of keys on Al. _Now let's hope that this is the front door key._ And it is. She leaves to door open and goes for Al. She drags him inside and upstairs to the bedroom and places him on the bed. Emily runs down stairs to shut the front door so no one walks in uninvited. After that chore is done she runs up the stairs to join her Al.


	4. Ch 4 The Prince Awakens

**The Prince Awakens**

*** New chapter slight smut and fluff here and there, but nothing to bad. Still stuck in Russia's basement. No idea when the next update will be, hopefully before schools starts. Thank you historyaddict and DolphinAssasinTheWaywardMage for the review and follow respectfully. Enjoy!**

Al finally wakes up in the morning with a killer headache, no clothes, and the sun's rays blinding him. _Ugh what happen last night? _He thinks as he covers he head with the bedcovers, trying to ease his headache. _Well I went to the bar as always, _he begins to recall. He then members Emily and her screams for him being the last thing he remembers. _Emily!_ _Matt and Oliver are going to get an ass-whooping._ He assumes Oliver is in on it, how else would he get home. He jolts up from the covers and runs out the door. He completely misses Emily in the kitchen cooking breakfast with one of Al's tee-shirts on. Al gets out of the door and sees Emily's Audi R8. "Whose fucking car is this?"

"IF YOU FUCKING THINK OF HITTING MY DAMN CAR, I'LL PUT YOU BACK INTO UNCONSCIOUSNESS!" Al hears the feminine voice and turns around to see Emily in his favorite 3OH!3 white tee-shirt standing in the doorway. The sun and the tee-shirt did not do a good job of hiding her sexy laced black thong or bra. Al then goes to the door and scoops her off of her feet.

"You're safe. They didn't do anything to you right?" Al questions her.

"Yes I'm fine, but no thanks to you."

"What happened last night?" Al asks as he carries Emily though the doorway and sets her on the couch.

"Well Matt tried to kidnap me and you came to my daring rescue." Emily explains as Al gains a look of self-confidence due to his heroism in saving Emily. "However he diverted his attention from me to you once he found out that I was with you. You fought and while Matt was busy beating your ass, I hit him unconscious with a nearby pipe. I pulled him off you and carried you to my car and drove home."

"But wait how did you find my house?"

"I looked though your phone and called this nice man, Oliver I think his name was. Oh and by the way you might want to be nicer with your contact names so that if someone needs to contact a person though your phone, they will not call them the sugar-fuck bastard." Al then leans in and gives Emily a big kiss on her lips. "What the fuck was that for?"

"A kiss for my hero." Al sneered. Expecting to be slapped across the face after his comment, Al was caught off guard when Emily jumped on top of him and kissed him back.

And so starts their make-out and tickle session on the couch, which is visible to anyone who passes by, because they forgot to close the front door. Many pass with disgust for their indecency to at least close their door like a person of some self-regard. Many veterans of the neighborhood know this is common behavior for Al when he brings a new girl and ignore the rusty sex voices and giggles coming from the doorway. _At least they aren't having sex on the front lawn_ they think, which has happened multiple times before. Al finally starts to make another move on Emily by unhooking her laced bra and is successful of this action.

When Emily feels the bra loosen, she sits up on Al's stomach and says in a raspy voice, "Oh, you want to move onwards uhh. Well I'll see you in the bedroom." She tries to jump off of Al and run to the bedroom to beat Al to it, however Al grabs her stomach and holds her down.

"But what about that delicious breakfast that you made for us?" he jokes and tickles her thighs.

"It can wait. I have waited all night for my prince to wake up; he can wait for my breakfast." With that he scoops up Emily and carries her bridal style up to the bedroom and they close the door behind them.

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Emily rolls off of Al and back on to the bed and cuddles up to him. "Now I don't know about you, but I sure worked up an appetite. You want to go down to have breakfast?" she whispers into his ear.

"Sure I thought you would never ask." He jumps out of bed as Emily pulls over the tee-shirt that she had on earlier.

"Hey aren't you going to put some pants on? I think we left the front door open."

"Who cares? If they haven't seen my penis yet, then they are now!" He yells while going down the stair to the kitchen. Emily lets out a groan and follows him to the kitchen. Her hypothesis about them leaving the door ajar was right so she fixed it by closing it. The food was slightly cold, but nothing with putting it in the microwave wouldn't fix. They eat and Al leaves to put his dirty dishes in the sink.

"Hey you didn't eat any of the bacon that I made for you." Emily whimpers.

"I'm a vegan. I don't eat meat." He replies.

"It's tofu you ass! I'm a vegan too and it was it your fridge! I was too tried from dragging your ass home last night that I didn't have time to shop for food."

"Umm? I don't remember buying it but then I just go to the vegan section of the supermarket and dump shit into my cart." He picks up a piece and eats it and grabs another this time having a piece stick out of his mouth for Emily to have. She plays along taking the bacon and falls for the bacon kiss trick from Al.

"So you're helping me find my car right?" Al asks changing the mood.

"You're going to put pants on before doing that, right?" she asked not answering his question.

"Yes, mom, I'm going to put pants on. Geesh what is your deal with me running around public in the nude. I do it all the time." teased Al.

"I don't want to bail your ass out of jail. Why would I help you find your car? I suggest checking tow companies if you don't remember were you parked it." She says going back to the original subject while taking a sip of her coffee.

"Didn't forget where I parked it. I parked it in night parking only." Al argued.

"Nice job asshole. Good luck finding it!" she teased

"Hey it's not my fault I was knocked out unconscious by my motherfucking brother. The least you can do is let me lend your car." He whined.

"Oh hell no! You are not using my car without me in it and driving it!"

"HOW THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM GOING TO FIND MY FUCKING CAR?!" Al yelled. Emily saw that she was pushing him too far. She knew exactly where his car was, someone called about it last night and she picked it up, paid the towing fee, and hid it.

"Ok, Ok calm your tits. I'll drive around to look for your car, but you're paying for my gas." She says trying to calm the American down.

"Alright let's go!" He insisted as he headed for the door.

"HEY WAIT!" she screamed and stood up from her seat.

He turns around from the front door, accidently flashing a young girl who was across the street. "What?"

"You will wear pants in my car unless I tell you otherwise. Get dressed and then we will go." She nags. Al lets out a groan, slams the front door shut, and drags his feet up the stairs. Emily walks over to her suitcase that had not made it upstairs yet, and puts on a pair of jeans. "You might want to bring a shirt and a pair of shoes as well so they will give you your car back." She yells to the dressing Al as she grabs her car keys. Al lets out another groan only louder. "Just do it." She retaliates. Al finally stomps down the stairs with a shirt and shoes in his hands and walks out the front door with Emily following not far behind. "Where do you want to check first?"

"Well I want to see if I'm lucky and check if it is still parked where I parked it, 21st and Baker Street." He answers and puts his feet up on the dash.

"Hey I'm not your chauffeur! Feet on the floor!" she objects. Al stomps his feet on to the floor of the car. They spend the whole afternoon searching for the car, but Emily doesn't take Al anywhere near where the car is hidden. After checking the last car shop they decide to go home for dinner.

"Alright I all out of options, someone had to steal my car, and they will receive hell when I find out." Al complains. "Wait a minute where's my bat?" Al frantically runs into his house leaving the car door wide open and began searching for his prized weapon, but cannot find it. "Shit! I must have left it in the alley last night!"

"You thought that I would forget to take this?" she asks as she pulls the nailed bat from her trunk.

"Batty!" He shouted running towards the girl holding his bat. He takes his bat and thanks Emily by French dipping and giving her a kiss.

"Fine. You can use my car. Only if you tell me where you are going and my car is returned in the way it was when you took it out." Emily finally gives in. Al thanks her again with a kiss. Then she pushes him into his seat and sits on his lap, kissing him passionately.

As he lowers the seat as far as it can go, he teases "Can I take my pants off now?"

She responds with, "No I'll do that."


End file.
